Overheard at Job Day

My Mom (an ER nurse who was visiting the 1st graders at Emily's school yesterday, and had just mentioned that in the summer they unfortunately see alot of kids in the ER who drown in swimming pools):

"So, what can you kids do to make sure that you don't drown in a swimming pool?"

Kid 1: "Wear a life jacket!"
Kid 2: "Learn to swim!"
Kid 3: "Wear floaties on your arms!"
Kid 4: "Wear a seat belt!"

I'm wondering if that kid blacked-out during the motorcycle cop's presentation?

At the dinner table...

Paige: "Mom, [little boy at daycare] pushed me down and now I have a bruise (bwooze) on my head."

Me: "Hmmm, was it an accident or did he do it on purpose?"

P: "He did it on purpose (pope-us)."

M: "Wow. I wonder why would he do something like that?"

P: *shrugs* "Boys don't think (sink), Momma."


There's a real sense of pride and accomplishment when a major life lesson you've been trying to impart to them just clicks.

Overheard in the office...

I'm so tired of this conversation:

Client: "Hi, I'd like to make an appointment."

Me: "OK, his first available appointment is blah, blah, blah."

C: "Oh. OK. Well, I guess I'll take that appointment."
(long pause)
"So, he doesn't have anything sooner than that?"

M: (holding back, remaining professional) "no."

C: "Because, I've been coming to see him for, like, five years now."

What I wish I could say (aka, my inner dialog): Oh! Why didn't you mention that before? For you, of course we have an earlier appointment. Now, since you're such an exclusive client, I'm sure you know the secret handshake, right? Because unless you know the secret handshake, I'm afraid I can't access the chamber of hidden appointments.

What I get to say: "Sorry, that's the first available."